Things that Make me Laugh

I GOT A GOOD LAUGH FROM…

Laugh #1

Every month I review our bills and every month I find some error.  This month it was on our AT&T wireless bill.  Ry’s line had charges on it for mobile downloads, aka music, pictures and screensaver applications.   I doubled checked with Ryan to make sure he hadn’t purchased any of these applications.  He assured me he hadn’t.  He called AT&T to clear it up.  I told him the number to dial from his cell phone was 311.  

Here is how the conversation unfolded:

Ryan:  I would like to get some faulty charges taken off of my bill. You hear a long pause on the other end.  Ryan repeats himself explaining that he was charged for something he had not purchased and wants them taken off his bill. 

Lady:  “Did you file a police report?” 

(I start dying of laughter….)

Ryan in an irritated voice: NO I HAVE NOT filed a police report, I just want it taken off my bill. 

Lady: You want what? 

Ryan:  I was charged for something I did not buy.

Lady: This is the Austin information center in connection with the Austin Police department.

Ryan:  Looked at me and gave me the glare…311 is not the right number.

Me:  Whoops I meant 611.  It’s amazing how one number can make such a big difference.  I could not stop laughing all night.   I’m sure the lady thought Ryan was a nut case to file a police report on his cell phone bill. 

Watch out AT&T we’re following up with the police next time ;0

Laugh #2

I’ve been on the road a lot with work. So I brought a nice long book to read while waiting in airports.  At one airport I went through the security line with my belongings.  I put my shoes on the moving belt.  I got out my liquids and laptop and pushed everything through the scanner.  I walked through the metal detector and the lady told me she needed to search my belongings. 

At this point I thought, I bet my hair straightener looked like a weapon or maybe I have a liquid that is over 3 oz.  The security guard started digging through my suitcase.  She went through my stuff item by item.  Then she grabbed my book, George Bush’s DECISION POINTS.  She looked at the book and then she looked at me.  I of course gave a HUGE smile being the big Republican that I am.  

She said, “I’m going to need to run this book through the scanner by itself.” There was only one security line open, so everyone waiting watched as George Bush’s face was put through the scanner.  Once it came through, the TSA official starts flipping through the pages. Everyone was staring as my book got so much attention.  Finally, I got the cleared green light and I started walking to my gate.  I let out one huge laugh as I thought to myself, “I bet she was a democrat!” Haha.  I’m sure a book has never gotten that much attention at a security line as George’s book did.

Laugh #3

I returned my rental car at Enterprise (one of those locations where you take a shuttle to the terminal...not connected to the airport) and ran to the enterprise restroom to change my clothes. The bathroom was nasty.  It was 10 times worse than a gas station restroom. I immediately started lining the floor with paper towels and even laid down a second layer of paper because I did not want my belongings touching anything. I laid my suitcase down, got my clothes out and changed. There was no way in heck I was going to pick up all of the dirty paper towels, so I just left them on the floor.  As I walked out, I locked eyes with a woman about to walk into the restroom.  I started laughing because she was about to walk into a restroom lined with paper towels.  When she came out, I avoided all eye contact with her. I'm sure she thought I was some crazy germaphobe.